{"id":24,"date":"2026-08-10T03:42:30","date_gmt":"2026-08-10T03:42:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/amosasa.com\/?p=24"},"modified":"2026-08-10T03:42:38","modified_gmt":"2026-08-10T03:42:38","slug":"my-wife-insists-on-cooking-everything-from-scratch-aita","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/amosasa.com\/archives\/24","title":{"rendered":"\u201cMy wife insists on cooking everything from scratch. AITA?\u201d"},"content":{"rendered":"
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I\u2019m 35M, my wife is 33F, married 5 years. This feels kind of dumb to even be arguing about, but here we are. Over the last year my wife has gotten really intense about food. She cooks everything from scratch now. Not just dinner, but literally all of it. It started off just bread, granola, cakes and stuff like that. But now it\u2019s pasta sauces, potato waffles, literally everything! Before anyone jumps on me, yes, her food is good. She\u2019s a good cook and I know she puts a ton of time into it. That\u2019s not the issue. The issue is that sometimes I don\u2019t want a homemade version of things. Sometimes I just want the normal, store-bought kind. Her argument is that she does most of the cooking and grocery shopping, so it makes sense to do things her way. She also says she doesn\u2019t want junk food in the house at all because it \u201cgoes against her values.\u201d I don\u2019t really get that, but okay. What bugs me is her solution, which is that if I want junk food, I should eat it outside the house. So now if I want a burger or chips or whatever, I\u2019m grabbing fast food on the way home or eating snacks at work like I\u2019m hiding it. That feels ridiculous to me. I\u2019m an adult, not a kid sneaking candy. I feel very deceptive. Whenever I bring this up, she says I\u2019m being ungrateful and dismissing how much work she puts in. I don\u2019t think that\u2019s fair. I appreciate the effort, I just don\u2019t want every single food choice to be homemade and \u201chealthy\u201d all the time. Am I actually the ahole here for wanting some normal, unhealthy food in my own house?<\/p>\n

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Here\u2019s what people had to say to OP:<\/h2>\n

Far-Investigator-841\u00a0said:<\/p>\n

NTA as a wife that LOVES to cook from scratch, there are times when kraft mac n cheese sounds good or a frozen pizza. Doesn\u2019t mean my mac n cheese isnt better or that my fresh made pizza isnt more delicious. Just sometimes we want what were used to, or comfort food. Your a grown adult.<\/p>\n

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You should be able to eat those things in your home. Your not a petulant child asking for more goldfish as your primary meal. Try to talk to her and get to the heart of it. But remind just as much as she is wanting you to respect that she does the cooking and wants to do it fro. scratch, having creature comforts for you to consume or make yourself is perfectly reasonable. Your not forcing her to eat them.<\/p>\n

wesmorgan1\u00a0said:<\/p>\n

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She doesn\u2019t get to rule on every piece of food that comes into the house. Nothing says you have to eat the same meals at every sitting. NTA. There\u2019s nothing wrong with having occasional times where each of you is responsible for your own meal.<\/p>\n

(In my house, we call that \u201cfreelancing for dinner.\u201d) Put a few of those on the schedule in advance (say, one dinner each week and a weekend lunch?) so she knows when not to cook for both of you.<\/p>\n

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BlondDee1970\u00a0said:<\/p>\n

NTA. You\u2019re a grown man and it sounds like your wife has gotten a bit controlling in regards to food. You\u2019re in a marriage, not prison. You\u2019re allowed choices. Choose a couple days a week where you\u2019ll take care of your meals and stick to that. It\u2019s not ungrateful \u2013 your wife is your partner \u2013 not your mom.<\/p>\n

Reptyle216\u00a0said:<\/p>\n

NTA. You\u2019re an adult; you can make your own dietary choices and keep snack food for yourself in the kitchen that\u2019s yours as much as it\u2019s your wife\u2019s. She doesn\u2019t have to eat it. If she doesn\u2019t understand that, remind her as often as necessary.<\/p>\n

Mullein55\u00a0said:<\/p>\n

NTA. It\u2019s great that your wife cooks things from scratch and cares about healthy eating. However, you should not have to hide the fact that you enjoy fast food even if she doesn\u2019t, or feel you must eat it behind her back.<\/p>\n

Your wife is choosing to put a lot of effort into her cooking and expecting appreciation for it whilst not allowing you to choose to eat junk food\/store bought food occasionally at home nor appreciating that this is a choice you wish to make. Seems unfair to me.<\/p>\n

If it were me, once a month or so, I would just go ahead and tell her you are bringing home take out. Then bring it home and enjoy it. If she doesn\u2019t like it, remind her this is your home too!<\/p>\n

ohmysun\u00a0said:<\/p>\n

Never in my life have I heard a more privileged complaint. Shop for and make your own junk food and leave her out of it. You are your own person but its insane of you to act like she is the problem here. I would give so much to have someone making me homemade food all the time. YTA.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n